Put your hands up

Several days ago, our lecturer told us to do an individual presentation for our next class. Few days before the presentation, I was having a panic attack as I'm not really sure on how to do it. I asked my friends and clearly they were not quite sure as well. While I was busy bugging my friends through facebook and text messages, my mum came up to me and said "Why don't you email your lecturer, ask him about it?"

I was terrified by this idea.

I have to admit, when I entered UBD, I barely went up to my lecturers to ask for guidance. Especially after a mind-numbing lecture, I will ask my friends if they understand. Most of them will reply "I don't get it either." And we will all just quietly accept that fact. I don't know why we don't have the courage to just raise our hands in class and tell the lecturer we don't understand. I'm sure I am not the only one who feel this way.

Does this only happen among Asian students? When we need to meet up with the lecturer, we will bring our friends along even though they don't need to be there. I know I never once raised my hand in class from primary school up until now (sometimes I do but rarely). There are several reasons why I would not ask the lecturer for help, one of them are I am afraid I would not understand even after the lecturer explained again. It is scary to know that you're not able to grasp the idea and that you feel like you are not smart enough to understand. I'm also afraid I will annoy the lecturer. This happen to me in primary school, where I asked my math teacher to explain to me again about some math problem. His reaction: He sighed and rolled his eyes at me. I regretted asking and hated maths after that (I need to get over this trauma.). I could list out all my reasons but I know it will not help me in my studies. It will only cause me to feel regrets for not taking the opportunities that was presented to me.

I am ashamed knowing that I am not assertive enough to stand on my ground, demanding asking the lecturer to help me in my studies. I need to change. All we need to do is just put our hands up and ask.   Do you have the same problem? Or is it just me?

p/s: Maybe it's just me.

Wife Beater or Singlet?

Several days ago, I came a across the word "wife beater" while talking with my friends. This started when I mistook her describing a tank top with a tube top.So she explained to me the differences between a tank top and a tube top. While I was trying to digest this new information, the word 'wife beater' came out of nowhere. So  asked her "What's a wife beater? Is it some sort of a sweater or something?" She told me that it is similar like a singlet.

This got me thinking.


Why wife beater? I don't understand why would anyone called it that? Why can't they call it singlet? Why can't they call it a husband beater? The name is so degrading and not to mention sexist and overpowering. I was still puzzled by this that I decided to look it up in the net, surprisingly woman can also wear a wife beater! So if a woman do wear a wife beater, do they still call it a wife beater or just beat-er? (Excuse the pun)

A man wearing a black wife beater

A woman wearing a black wife beater

The term wife beater in someway not only degrading to women but also to men as well. It carries the message that men are violent creatures and that they only know how to use brute strength instead of their brains.

I tried to look up for the origin of the word and I found two sites that kind of give me the explanation. Here and Here.



But what I want to ask is that..why can't we just call it a singlet?



p/s: I am not a hardcore feminist.

Hello?

So what now?

I never blog before .... I blogged before but I gave up because I don't really know what to write... either that or I'm just not good at writing...


 This blog is for me to write my reflections upon my academic life in University Brunei Darussalam. I am currently a 4th year student, majoring in English Language Studies. I'm an average student, still nervous when giving presentation and afraid of lecturers.


I will try my best...for this blog and for my grades...


p/s: I'm scared.